S.96 - Illegalizes park bench napping. (Does not override municipal regulations.)
S.123 - Provides monies for harvesting fallow fields.
S.249 - Officially exchanges the meanings of “prole” and “rube”.
S.294 - Grants tax-exempt status to occupied swing sets.
S.621 - Replaces one dispute with another. Pays lip service to conscientious objectors.
S.699 - Names Senate class hamster “Filibuster.”
S.764 - Allows export of Uncle Sam effigies.
S.802 - Subsidizes larkspur seeds for landscaping corporations.
S.963 - Speaks disparagingly of would-be expatriates.
S.1212 - Increases demand for Uncle Sam effigies.
S.1590 - Distributes FEMA support to victims of the Cleveland chest hair vortex.
S.1694 - Demotes one- and two-letter words to new “wordoid” classification.
S.1893 - Emboldens our enemy.
S.1912 - Emboldens the font on interstate signs.
S.2104 - Allows an appeal from unpardoned turkeys.
S.2285 - Equivocates.
S.2286 - Equivocates again.
S.2766 - Provides monies for harvesting fallow fields.
Thursday, June 26, 2008
Write Against
I require a lobster at three in the morning.
I require a drive-thru Mount Rushmore.
Demonstrate for me the next year's model.
Talk about the colors available from the factory,
about the same tunes droning from the stereo,
from under the hood.
Let me valence you, baby.
Let me short out the sparkplugs
of your neurons
in Lake Michigan.
You can crack me open
like a pomegranate,
wash out in the wharf
the grotto of my head,
encapsulate me in a blurb.
Experience the fronds in my stead and blog about them.
Open the moon roof; be my orrery.
Demonstrate for me the sky.
I require a drive-thru Mount Rushmore.
Demonstrate for me the next year's model.
Talk about the colors available from the factory,
about the same tunes droning from the stereo,
from under the hood.
Let me valence you, baby.
Let me short out the sparkplugs
of your neurons
in Lake Michigan.
You can crack me open
like a pomegranate,
wash out in the wharf
the grotto of my head,
encapsulate me in a blurb.
Experience the fronds in my stead and blog about them.
Open the moon roof; be my orrery.
Demonstrate for me the sky.
Friday, June 13, 2008
requiescat in pacem
I don't purport to be able to give any more fitting a tribute than the many better men and women who have already spoke in this regard, but I would be remiss to remain silent upon the loss of probably the finest journalist of our era.
The enthusiasm and respect Tim Russert had for the fields of journalism and politics were absolutely unparalleled, and it is a depressing notion to consider the remainder of this election season without his passionate, informed commentary. This is to say nothing of his long-held position as host of Meet the Press; I cannot imagine that his successor will be able to live up to his legacy.
Exhaustive research, nonpartisan fairness, and an absolute love for his craft were his hallmarks. As Senator Obama put it, he was the standard-bearer for serious journalism today, and the void left in American news upon his passing will not soon be filled.
Tim Russert - 1950-2008. RIP.
The enthusiasm and respect Tim Russert had for the fields of journalism and politics were absolutely unparalleled, and it is a depressing notion to consider the remainder of this election season without his passionate, informed commentary. This is to say nothing of his long-held position as host of Meet the Press; I cannot imagine that his successor will be able to live up to his legacy.
Exhaustive research, nonpartisan fairness, and an absolute love for his craft were his hallmarks. As Senator Obama put it, he was the standard-bearer for serious journalism today, and the void left in American news upon his passing will not soon be filled.
Tim Russert - 1950-2008. RIP.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)