point / counterpoint

Point:
Knowing Latin is awesome, because any idiot can shoot off a simple conversation in Spanish, but being able to translate classical texts is an awesome ability to have.

Counterpoint:
Being known as "the student who knows Latin" in class can be somewhat unpleasant.

Presidential Debate drinking game

One drink
Obama: "Look,"
McCain: Any attempt to distinguish self from Bush administration

Three drinks
Obama: "... notion that..."
McCain: "... earmarks..." or "... pork-barrel spending..."

Five drinks
Obama: Stuttering/vocalizing for more than three seconds
McCain: Creepy old guy smile

Finish drink
Obama: "... my Muslim faith..."
McCain: "... gooks..."

mixed messages

No, sorry AIG, we'd love to help you guys but it would send a bad message to investors downplaying the risks associated with--

*eight hours later*

Okay but for real though we got this, here's eighty-five billion dollars, peace.

selections from my Google search history

"back pain"
"my back hurts"
"can i get vicodin for back pain"
"is the real white house like the west wing"

excerpts from English department brochure, Cleveland State University, 2008

"... the English department career advising office doubles as a balcony with no railing and a spectacular view of the Cleveland skyline. Please note that the English department is conveniently located on the 18th floor of Rhodes Tower to assist in your problem solving."

"Successful alumni:
Salty Lucas Finnegan, panhandler, East 18th and Prospect LLC
Jimmy Gascan McScroogie, rapscallion, Edgewater Park Picnic Table, inc.
Three-fingered Ed, currently between jobs"